How Do IEEs Experience ILIs? (Dating Mirage ITR)
I'm an ILI guy and completely confused about my dual and mirage types. A few years ago I casually dated an SEE cougar who said she was "preparing me for my wife". We stopped talking due to miscommunication on how serious it was. We only met a handful of times and I never thought that needed to be discussed.
Recently I received full karma in an intense relationship with an IEE who was much younger than me (over 21). She broke up with her only boyfriend of 5 years (SLI) and tells me she used me to get over him and isn't ready for a relationship. This of course led to issues because we saw each other constantly.
As is almost textbook mirage relations after a few months the tables turned and she asks for exclusivity as she said " Things are different now I've taught you how to get b*tches". For about 6 months there was an alternating cycle of one of us having the upper hand over the other in the "attachment" department.
No matter how adversarial it became we couldn't stop seeing each other w/ high frequency. It got to the point where she dropped out of college classes and it was at times difficult for me to focus on work because she lived so close by.
My SLE brother's girlfriend was the IEE's housemate who is EIE. The EIE explained what my actions were doing to the IEE behind the scenes. Without that I would never have any idea I think because of Fi.
In the end I felt like I got played harder than in any social situation I've ever been in by that IEE. Months later the EIE who was still living with her after we stopped talking said "she's not over you". I told her I didn't want to know how she knew that and started seeing an ESI friend who had been waiting for me to break it off with the IEE.
My confusion here is basically in ranking of the ITRs. SEE is supposed to be my dual and although I really like them, I haven't experienced the same spark as w/ mirage. In terms of SEEs I've met I've run into similar issues of miscommunication that caused conflict like w/ mirage. This has even happened w/ ESI.
Because we're all Fi valuing and I have Fe polr it is very hard for me to take emotions of SEE,ESI, or IEE seriously. While on the other hand it is probably extremely easy for those types to manipulate me.
I would say I agree w/ Gulenko's description of an aspect of mirage as "Interruption of Comfort". I can admit for sure say at least at one point I consciously waited for the IEE woman get comfortable then screw her over. As I said this alternated in an extremely toxic fashion that got worse and worse.
Despite that, the physical was better than with gamma FPs. This was less of an Se thing and more of an ability to manipulate my emotions.
To this day about 4 months after the whole thing mostly blew over I'm still a bit paranoid of that IEE.
I have literally no clue how SEEs or IEEs see me even with behind the scenes intelligence from an EIE living with an IEE.
TLDR: FP women are confusing. Dual and activity are supposed to be good ITRs however most likely fell for an IEE and never a dual or activator. Mirage is extremely toxic but ranked by Gulenko as second to dual for irrational types.
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Originally Posted by BrainlessSquid
