The nature of PoLR is all or nothing.
Times when it gets triggered... oh my. I do not go near Stratiyevskaya's descriptions. Ugh! Extremely bad for me.
The nature of PoLR is all or nothing.
Times when it gets triggered... oh my. I do not go near Stratiyevskaya's descriptions. Ugh! Extremely bad for me.
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
Thinking about the past. Yes, I was extremely (internally) reactive to any kind of [relational] comments about me and it lead to some sort of avoidance. I had no idea how to gain influence ethically/relationally i.e. to change people's attitudes towards me. It was always quite a blow. When people that has said something to me in the past made me very squeamish. I try to go past it. I still have no idea.
I 'm(/was) much more thick skinned about the issues that do not operate in area of ethics.
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
I might be repeating things said before, but I'm bumping this from my own POV.....
I relate to the description below, word for word, apart from the particular Nursing home example....
Basically FI polr means that I do not understand the subjective distance between me and someone else.....
I'm either going to be too friendly, or not enough with people..... and I'm not going to know what I am doing.....and I'm going to be very wary/cautious/clueless when it comes to creating /maintaining bonds with ppl.....
If I make a mistake, then i'll prob just retreat.... how much I'll retreat depends of the size of the 'hit' that I receive.... (either due explicit feedback, or maybe silence from the other persons....)
Due to this, FI Polrs need plenty of feedback, which FE creatives can be good at giving.....
Last edited by rtht; 10-12-2021 at 01:42 PM. Reason: wording
Fi PoLR is a really rough one to have.
The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.
The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".
I know these are old, and I have no clue whether you guys are still on the forums or not even, but… FWIW, I don't take typology very seriously at all myself either, but as an ESI/4D Fi I instantly/automatically inferred that there were relationship dynamics happening without consciously thinking about it. It was just the first thing that popped into my head. I thought that #4 may be cutting their own selves down in order to avoid having to cut someone else down (willing to self-sacrifice for the benefit of the others). #3 may have been saving his own skin because he cared more about himself than the others. #2 may have been eager or waiting for the opportunity to “cut off” the other person from their lives, thus the redundancy of cutting between them even though he's being cut off anyway.
With all of that said--as I was thinking about this, my head was overwhelmed by all the other possibilities that I thought of but did not type. I found this exercise mildly irritating/frustrating because there were so many possible angles that could be covered, yet no concrete/solid answer at the end of it all. I would have preferred more clues, hints, details; something that could've solidified responses. Something less abstract, uncertain, and open to interpretation only. I hated that in the end, there isn't a “right” answer. Ne PoLR head explosion. So much so that I did not even cover all the people in this image...
So yeah, I do think that people can derive type related things from this.
It is quite typical for me to overthink. Sometimes it is like this weird mind-reading exercise then when I don't it seems to hit others. It is a bizarre attempt. As to contrary some ILI's apparently experience Fe signals with high intensity as if it is something that should function like a machine but I'm not sure.
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
Actually, I did somewhat take expressions into account. Suicidal #4 wasn't depressed looking, thus the self-sacrifice rather than opportunistic about offing themselves. #2 cutting off the other was interpreted as them feeling some 'positive' way about their actions to me as well: “eager or waiting for the opportunity to 'cut off' the other person from their lives.”
In RL I soak up facial expressions, body language, etc. like a sponge and I can spot fake expressions from a mile away. I have above average expression reading abilities. I will notice something as “bad acting” and make fun of it while friends don't notice anything or see what I'm talking about, I score perfect or almost perfect scores on online tests, stuff like that. It's difficult for actors to fool me as well, it ruins most shows/movies for me. I don't fall for the superficial friendly facades, either, and I tend to notice it if there is sadness behind smiles. Bad idea to lie to me in RL, lol. But yeah, anything nonverbal definitely gets taken into account. I'm not typically very animated or expressive myself, though. If I am, usually deliberately conveying something is my intention (such as smiling to show I'm joking).
Ok, so you did not immediately scan the frame to form a truth behind the default baseline. That's how Ti works, I suppose. I just threw individual attitudes automatically into a dumpster because it is likely an improbable intent [based on whole] and then I thought what the "artist" was after with that if nothing at all - as it looks rather tragicomic as a whole.
As per rest, it does sound a lot like Fe ignoring (being soaked in it).
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
I don't understand what you mean with the Ti part...can you rephrase it?
Yeah, this was a really cool exercise for seeing peoples' type related information. I showed a couple of others just for fun. Contrary to the way I took expressions into account and ruled out misery/suicidal ideation for #4, my ILI friend ignored the expressions and perceived misery anyway. He also thought of #4 arriving to that miserable place over time, which never crossed my mind; I simply gathered information from whatever was in the present and plainly seen. (It also made me reeeee a bit because there wasn't anything present that indicated he might've arrived there over time, but he saw it as a metaphor for people in society, I guess.)
Last edited by Fluffy Princess Unicorn; 10-12-2021 at 10:54 PM.
Do you Fi polRs generally try to behave around everyone the same way regardless of how close they are because you cant tell when you need to behave differently to progress in a relationship? How do you react to closeness when you are certain it exists (for example with a clear, honest and expressive partner).
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
I have to say that I don't know what it means to progress in a relationship, as in terms of non SO ppl, I am just interacting with ppl.... how I behave will have a lot to do with feedback, so the more I get from FE/ general communication from other ppl, the more clear things are in terms of how I can behave....If I have to hold back or not...
My ex GF had strong FI, and made it clear that we was close, so I didn't need to worry about that with her
I just have like a professional mode and a me mode and everything in between. If I'm on my time off I usually just let it all out and don't care. At work I'm always in professional mode unless I'm around my trusted colleagues. I hate it, I can't stand having to act proper and professional, even though I'm very good at it. Once I've seen you prove that you can be trusted I'll let my real side out, even at work. I generally enjoy being polite and respectful, however if the other person isn't polite or respectful back I don't bother. If it's people I like I just act like my self. Uninhibited, acting on impulse, saying whatever comes to mind etc. I really like to make my friends laugh and be there for them so most my jokes will be for the sake of Fe, though sometimes I unintentionally offend or don't understand why people are getting offended. I actually offend my dual friends a lot sometimes. They take what I say too personally and I have to remind them I'm just doing it for the Lulz( Fe) and they calm down a bit usually.
This also ^
Fi polr from the inside is a very weird thing. I know personally the polr feels much like a blind spot, with it being some specific set of things I know I'm bad at but still can't quite place. I'm used to trying to look at myself and identify behaviors, but with my polr it's much more frustrating than with other aspects. Still though, there are certain things which I can pretty confidently label as a consequence of my Fi polr.
When I am talking about my most natural, saying random thoughts and idea without any filter which I use to interact with specific people, it's unsurprisingly pretty Ne centric random things which seem completely unconnected to anything by an outside observer. Truth, it turns out, is actually a filter, (if this has to do with weak Se, or just something which no one has fully and naturally integrated into their thoughts). There is though, a general thread of logical consistency in my thoughts. From my experience of talking to IEE's, I'd attribute this logical consistency to Ti, as they have a habit of forgetting and losing track of important logic details. This would presumably include trying define things and connecting them, as opposed to just having details switch between thoughts. This(and let me emphasize I am making this shit up IEE's or literally anyone else if you think I'm wrong please yell at me) allows for the creation of a story, in which previous details are used to spur new thoughts adding to the plotline, making it sound at least roughly believable, as opposed to an IEE whose random thoughts would not be able to connect and build off each other.
What the IEE's thoughts would have though is Fi, which is what I find much harder to identify. My knowledge of Fi personally is being able to properly feel out relationships with people, which I know I'm very bad at doing. Any attempt at understanding relationships is through trying to be scientific, learning from trial and error and constructing Ti heavy theories to figure out how things work. Socionics personally is just a way to patch up my Fi with Ti, along with my incessant focus on being aware of how I and other people work. I genuinely do not know what Fi is, it seems almost like it's an sense I don't have, an awareness that I can only emulate.
Can someone please tell me if Fi actually is an awareness of something or if I'm just crazy.
I generally feel like I require closeness to let myself out there, at least the way I want to so trust isn't the main factor but how comfortable I feel knowing someone or feeling connected. That said I'm pretty slow at determining this and I always appreciate it when someone else opens up first. Its interesting to see the difference between valuing that and not valuing it in both sides of the coin of bootless Fi.
It is. In social situations when you have Ti'ed it and you are sure of something EII comes and says something that indicates you have not considered while in fact you have done it logically. The best part of it is that you can even emulate supervisor's actions (and the end result of actions) logically (for various reasons) which kind leaves me thinking if I'm part of this shared reality.
PoLR is the weirdest sort of mindfuckery.
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
One thing I'd like to mention as well(which I presume is at least related to my Fi polr), is the fact that, from my knowledge, I've never actually felt any kind of strong emotional connection to anyone. Talking to people has yet to get me closer to anyone, with it usually just resulting in me knowing more about the person without actually developing any kind of relationship with them. It's very concerning to me that I don't actually know if I'm even able to really feel some sense of connection to another person, with the only hope I've had being that I have been, on rare occasions, able to feel connected to people through positive Fe environments, though in definitely a much different way than I'd expect a more 1 to 1 connection would feel like.
Anecdote from a month ago, hope it's interesting to someone!
Female LSI gets mad at ILE & I, though mainly at ILE.
-we decide to speak about it. being myself, i don't say much, but also because ILE keeps talking and saying the same things over and over. he gets this formalistic lawyer voice when he must speak about his emotions with people he isn't comfortable with. he asks LSI to tell lay out exactly what moments he fucked up and to explicitly tell him in the future when it reoccurs, so it can change. personally, i think it's silly cause it doesn't work that way, but it doesn't go down with the LSI (note that she's female, so more in touch with ethics) and i know why, but she isn't explicitly saying it, so i tell ILE: it doesn't work like that (implied: for some people. with me it's ok =) ) because it makes the relationship feel forced and awkward.
-we decide to give each other space, indefinitely
-after a week LSI texts me in private asking if we'd like to meet up once i'm better, and we're both totally over it
-now i become sort of a middle man. LSI regrets that perhaps she was too harsh but admits that it's unusual that she gets so mad. she says that she texted ILE, but he hasn't replied in days. i knew this, but say, really? i'll ask him what's up
-she says that every time she's ran into ILE, he looks terrified. i tell ILE this and he dead seriously concurs (i've nothing else to do but laugh really hard at that)
-i ask ILE what's up with the ignoring the text, he says he's just been busy. i can't tell what is the percentage of truth vs excuse
-i also worry that maybe i'm seeing things slightly wrong. perhaps he sincerely doesn't care about his friendship with LSI and doesn't want to resolve anything but leave it hanging. 1) i don't know how much of that would be due to pure avoidance 2) and he obviously regards relationships differently than I do, so i'm trying to figure out exactly in what way..?
-so i'm trying to figure out if it would be reasonable or unnecessary & annoying to bug him to see her again ( i like the trio that we form & wish things could go back to normal..)
-i eke out how he feels about the situation and her and decide that it's ok to bug him to see her again. i worry a bit that i'm being too meddlesome, but one night he thanks me for trying to help him in "things", which reassures me
-the three of us get dinner. for the first hour, ILE only speaks to and looks at me. LSI, being LSI, doesn't know how to initiate towards him
-in private, LSI and I agonize about how awkward this is. i say that i'll try to get what's going on out of him because i'm personally still a bit confused, but try to be casual about it because i realize that maybe it's a bit weird to outsiders that i like to bluntly ask these types of questions to him or get that info that most people would avoid out of fear of being indiscreet or meddlesome
-but then, he returns and something funny happens so we laugh and he seems to relax. after 20 minutes everyone's relaxed and back to normal (on the surface at least) !
-afterwards i ask ILE what he thought. he gives me a detailed answer: "it was fun." =)
-LSI, being beta (dramatic, intense) and having for dual the ethically flexible EIE, didn't expect that the situation would hit ILE so hard
-ILE wasn't okay for half a week, Fi PoLR is ignored, but unlike Fi ignoring, it's vulnerable..
-another reason he wasn't okay was because i got upset at him as well after the initial confrontation since something about how he handled it really perturbed me. it made sense when right after, he told me his goal had been to minimize LSI's anger towards me, regardless of her upset towards him, rather than resolve it properly. that made me mad because 1) that's stupid on so many levels 2) probably out of some sense of loyalty to LSI
-i was briefly upset and emotionally drained, but otherwise was very okay
-everything's fine now. i doubt LSI and ILE are capable of ever becoming emotionally close, but on the surface they have this fantastic chemistry
I am close with a different ILE and her reaction to Fi PoLR is very different. She tends to care more about her relationships and about connecting with the people she hangs out with. Her issue is more that she overcompensates and becomes excessive in trying to resolve Fi issues (misjudgement), though it has a similar effect of rendering the relationship awkward.
I've told her that she's weirdly over-polite when she speaks to strangers (e.g. cashier, doctor, whatever) and she said it's because she has trouble judging what people mean exactly if they're not expressive enough. Thus she tries to be very expressive so that other people will understand what she means (an unconscious "treat others the way you want to be treated" thing)
When you get to know more about a person, does it happen that a particular thing they say or share resonates strongly with you - it is something you have experienced in the past, and suddenly you remember how you felt about it at that time? What happens inside seems to look like this: you know something new about the person and you recognise that you have been in a similar position to them, too. The shared sentiment no matter how slight or small can grow your sense of trust in a person, and there can be a significance to them having shared this innermost thought/information with you. The knowledge of this connection can change how you relate to this person compared to other people in your life. You grow warmer toward them and more forthcoming with your feelings.
Do you think your greater ease of connection to a positive Fe-environment could be related to the emotion being tied into the situation/moment? e.g. the sentiment that ties you all together is decided or structured by the events taking place?
Do you not feel like a en elevated emotion and feeling around certain people? I get along with a lot of people, but the special ones hit right. I get more emotional, expressionist, and loud! In turn, they respond the same way back. Just a lot of emotional expression back and forth that just hits right. Makes me want to keep going back for more. Like...my one friend that I haven't seen for awhile and then when we see each other, were like screaming white chicks happy to see one another The connection is there too but it just always feels...good. Plus with a long continuation of this, there is a pattern and it feels nice. Attachment and closeness of that comes later.
Ya I have no idea what feeling you're talking about. Even if I get along with someone well generally there isn't really a difference between when I first talk to them and when I talk to them after knowing their entire life story, at least emotionally. I'd assume other Fi polr's have the same experience (if anyone would like to confirm).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phrenology
An optimist - does not get discouraged under any circumstances. Life upheavals and stressful events only toughen him and make more confident. He likes to laugh and entertain people. Enters contact with someone by involving him with a humorous remark. His humor is often sly and contain hints and double meanings. Easily enters into arguments and bets, especially if he is challenged. When arguing his points is often ironic, ridicules the views of his opponent. His irritability and hot temper may be unpleasant to others. However, he himself is not perceptive of this and believes that he is simply exchanging opinions.
http://www.wikisocion.net/en/index.php?title=LIE_Profile_by_Gulenko
I have Charlie X on and it made me think of this thread.
For me it is as if I can recognize different levels of paranoia.
The moment when I can think clearly I consider it either great or as a need to be reserved.
When it is great I can do a lot.
Individuals make it much harder to juggle with than a group of people [=more possibilities, attention shifting etc].
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
I was overthinking it, which made the description weird.
Perhaps it can come down to something more simple: a feeling-type person trusts in how they identify with a person. They observe and value quirks that are specific to an individual and also understand how that particular person makes them feel, compared with another person.
Sort of in line with the structure or responsiveness that Fe environments can provide, I had a thought that Ti (not necessarily Fi) has the ability to determine whether someone is a receptive conversation partner: whether you are both on the same level and able to understand each other...whether you are a good fit
Your intuition and logic could determine whether mutual interests lead to opportunities for you to spend more time with a particular person, and that could have an effect of bringing them closer to you.
Shared experiences can deepen a bond, without you necessarily having to express that to someone in a heart-to-heart way. So there is that, too.
That is more of a description of me, to be honest. I believe that Fi polr needs validation of their relationship to understand whether it is falling apart or not.
Typically, for comparison, I don't really talk to people about whether I like them or not. It is implied, or I have said it once, we have agreed, and that is that. I don't have problems picking up whether that has changed from context clues. Nor do I get paranoid when someone has said something. Sometimes, if someone says something ambiguous, I'll consider whether I understand what it means or not, and I might get worried if I believe it is something bad, but I usually don't worry about it, and have a relaxed opinion on the matter.
In other words, I am comfortable in my relations with other people, and uncomfortable talking about my feelings.
Hypothetically, Fi Polr is uncomfortable with their relations with other people, and comfortable talking about their feelings.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phrenology
An optimist - does not get discouraged under any circumstances. Life upheavals and stressful events only toughen him and make more confident. He likes to laugh and entertain people. Enters contact with someone by involving him with a humorous remark. His humor is often sly and contain hints and double meanings. Easily enters into arguments and bets, especially if he is challenged. When arguing his points is often ironic, ridicules the views of his opponent. His irritability and hot temper may be unpleasant to others. However, he himself is not perceptive of this and believes that he is simply exchanging opinions.
http://www.wikisocion.net/en/index.php?title=LIE_Profile_by_Gulenko
Validation of a relationship can be implied in gestures toward a person - I think that's worth adding to the points you raised. It doesn't have to be stated that I like you in plain words.
Inviting someone out to see a movie or just saying "I'd like to see you, it has been a while" removes ambiguity (if there was any) about mutual feelings.
I follow that you are comfortable in your bond with someone and also uncomfortable talking about your own feelings, but what I was thinking about Fi polr types in particular is that they are tuned into Fe produced by the people they are interacting with.
It might follow that rather than saying "I feel like I'm not as close to you as we used to be", ILE or SLE might say "You don't seem as open/expressive with me as you used to be". The focus is on other people's feelings about/toward them, rather than their own feelings.
When I say this I have a specific friend in mind who may be LII - so neither Fi or Fe polr.
1st impression - probably some game theory exercise. If it is, the game is rigged from the start and needs to be re-balanced. #3 spawned in the best spot, nobody else has a chance.
2nd pass - maybe its a videogame that usually works, but this instance is bugged and everybody needs to die to re-start.
3rd pass - A game is unlikely, who would go through the trouble of drawing this? Unless its one of those SAW movies. They're chained to the tree, and the only options are to cut off a limb or cut the tree.
4th pass - Eh it's probably a metaphor for people stuff. Maybe the tree is a group/family/business and #3 wants to cut ties with #2. Same with #1 or #1 is collateral damage. And #4 wants to cut ties with all of them, or just #3 and the other two are collateral.
5th - Maybe it represents 2 partnerships poisoned by greed. #3 wants it all. #1 is passive or oblivious that her partner is about to drop her for a bigger share. #2 played dirty and got outplayed by #3 who is even dirtier. #4 wants no parts of it
6th - bored/annoyed of thinking about that. #1 is pregnant with a chest-burster alien baby, and she's gonna blow any minute. (they're in the trees to escape the aliens below) #2 has a bullshit saw that isn't getting the job done at all. Panic sets in. #3 freaks out and goes every man for himself. #4 realizes the commotion is going to give away their hiding spot, and decides to cut his branch just enough to lower himself down and make a run for another tree.
I hate that picture and their lego figurine smiles, I don't really even want to think about it and what it means.
Your first impression: "The game is rigged from the start" - on the surface that does seem like a very logical way of viewing the image.
By that I mean, I personally don't see inherent traps or imagine this being a setup but instead an unfortunate accident.
I noticed that your third impression didn't provide the people involved with much agency - they were chained from the outset, so their options were limited and inevitable. The second impression is more detached and impersonal than how I would view the image. Your fifth impression is the closest to what I imagined - that their lives were intertwined well before the event shown in the image. Your sixth impression is very creative and I noticed that you viewed person 3 in a similar way to how I did (every man for himself).
When I looked at the image I had a single impression: that they ended up trapped here because they were base jumpers, or used parachutes in poor weather.
Person 1 had calmly offered themselves up as a sacrifice, with an undercurrent of pressure from persons 2 and 3.
Person 1 convinces themselves that by allowing the others greater opportunity to be airlifted or otherwise plucked from the tree to safety they are doing a good deed but their natural fear and regret prevents them from sawing themselves off the tree. Person 2 offers to assist Person 1.
When person 4 overhears person 1's decision they are mortified. Following this ordeal and being stuck with the others in the tree they came to realise that person 1 was the only true friend and one they could trust. Person 4 can't imagine the recovery ahead from this incident and living with the memory of person 1 sacrificing themselves, and them somehow being party to the decision. Overwhelmed and desperate to be free, they get to sawing themselves off the tree.
Persons 2 and 3 individually perceive themselves as "the one" to outlast and emerge from the deadly forest a hero/ine. While the group discussion had focused on attracting an aerial rescue, persons 2 and 3 plan secretly, in their own minds, to do away with the remaining members of the group and work their way down to ground level to navigate the forest floor. Neither person 2 or 3 want to share this glory, and neither of them realise the other has a similar line of thinking.
I don't really hate the picture, but I think it's very superficial. You can read whatever you want into it.
Like okay, the guy on the right is sawing his own branch off, does that mean self-sabotage? Suicidal ideation? Does he know he's doing it? Is he retarded? Who gave him the saw anyway if he's retarded?